Saturday, December 11, 2010

I Am A Raincoat

Before I get started here: you've probably noticed that you are now staring at snow and not book pages. I think I might change the blog's background monthly -- keeps things fresh, and all.

Anyways! I think it's high time for another language-related spiel, don't you? (By the way, the word 'spiel' comes from German, which is why we pronounce it with a 'sh' sound despite the lack of an h.)

I noticed that I have a habit of muttering phrases in languages that I'm 'investigating' (aka learning at the speed of a lethargic sea cucumber) to myself for no good reason whatsoever. They are rarely things one would consider useful -- very few of them would help me as a tourist, and there are several I doubt I'll ever use exactly as they are.

I only noticed this habit lately, but now that I think about it, it's not a new thing. I can remember repeating 'Je suis un imperméable' to myself back when I was a lower level Frenchling. Incidentally, that phrase means 'I am a raincoat.' Not particularly useful when sightseeing in Paris.

My initial reaction when I noticed that I do this was "Ah man, I'd better stop. People are going to think I'm crazy... er." But after a bit of thought, I realized that phrase parroting is actually probably a brilliant language learning strategy. Why? Because it's just what babies do when they learn their natural language. They don't try to learn the most useful things or the words they're going to need most. They just pick a word that they like and repeat it, whether it be 'mama' or 'shut up!'

Of course, I'm no longer a baby. I already have one language in my head and I'm not going to learn another by phrase parroting. But I think that repeating random words is still a really great idea, if only because it has the same function as a baby's babbling and cooing does -- it teaches you the sounds of the language without yet having to worry much about meaning.

So, if you're learning a language, I recommend hitting up YouTube for songs, shows, movies, what have you in that language. If you find yourself liking some phrases, embrace them! Remember and repeat them. And then let me know how it goes, because I'm curious to know if it is a valid strategy or if I'm just a freak.

Tomorrow (or some other day in the near future) I shall make a list of my favorite phrases to repeat. Because most of them make just as much sense as 'je suis un imperméable,' you see.

Till then.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Like Nicotine Patches. Except for Meat.

Honestly, I'm all for becoming a vegetarian.

Not because I'm opposed to killing for food, mind you. I acknowledge that humans are naturally omnivorous, and agree that killing and eating other animals isn't an evil of modern society any more than reproducing is. It's not the idea that doesn't rest well with me -- it's the way we carry that idea out.

For example:
  • Mass meat production is environmentally unsustainable. Animal wastes from factory farms cause huge amounts of pollution, and the meat industry is actually the number one producer of greenhouse gases.
  • Eating meat is less efficient than eating plant-derived food. Biology tells us that energy transfers from one trophic level to the next is far from 100% efficient -- which basically means that if you take a field and plant it with grain for bread, you can feed many more people than you can if you take a field, plant it with grain, feed that grain to cows, and then kill and eat the cows.
  • Have you ever seen a picture or video of a factory farm? 'Nuff said.
Yeah, so, becoming vegetarian? Sounds like a good deal to me.

But there's one problem: I don't think I could give up meat.

I like meat. Though I don't eat much of it, but I would definitely miss it if I gave it up. Chicken and turkey I could probably do away with. Ham and pork might be hard, but I'd get over it. But hamburgers? How could I give up ground beef? And fish? Forget it! Never going to happen.

I'm pretty sure I'm not alone here. I'm sure that there've got to be more people -- quite a good number of people, I'd suspect -- who have all these reasons to become vegetarian and that one big but standing in their way.

So! I've come up with a simple and brilliant solution that will probably be ridiculed from here to somewhere very far away: demi-vegetarianism.

Ah, I hear scoffs already. Bona fide vegetarians are always looked at with this sort of... I dunno, contempt. What, you're too good for meat or something? Why're you trying to fight how humans naturally are? You're just looking for attention, aren't you? I can't imagine the kind of harsh judgement a demi-vegetarian would be subjected to.

But hear me out here. If you can't bear to give up meat entirely, why can't you just cut back? Maybe have weeks during which you do eat meat, and weeks during which you don't. Or stop eating the kinds of meat you can live without. Or even just make an active effort to choose alternative foods.

But wouldn't this be horribly hypocritical? Sure, if your sole reason for being vegetarians was a moral thing. If you say "It's wrong to eat animals!" and then go around eating animals, you're not going to garner yourself any sympathy. But what if you object to the meat industry? Or you'd like to be vegetarian for health reasons? If you can't give up meat entirely, wouldn't it be better to just cut back?

And who knows? Maybe you'll find that you don't miss meat as much as you thought, and decide to go all out. Demi-vegetarianism could either be a lifestyle choice on its own, or like training wheels for the real thing.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is this: do you have to never use an electrical appliance again in order to conserve energy? No! Do you have to refuse sweets forever in order to eat healthily? No! In my opinion, the only reason why vegetarianism is "all or nothing" is because vegetarians are stereotyped as either fanatical or only doing it for the attention -- therefore, any deviation from leafy green orthodoxy is mocked.

I think, after Thanksgiving, I might try being a demi-vegetarian for awhile and see how it works out.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Because Buckets are Classy

I shall now bestow upon my blog a post regarding one of my very favorite subjects, which incredibly has somehow not yet shown up. This subject is, of course, language.

WARNING: GEEKERY AHEAD.

So, a couple weeks ago I found myself at the public library, and I decided it'd be a fun idea to raid the shelf of language learning books. Recently, I've been going on a bit of a Germanic languages trip, so I left with one book on German, one on Norwegian, one on Danish, and one on good ol' English grammar.

Turns out the German book, though useful, is really a grammar guide aimed at people who already have a base in the language. And so, though German is very high on my "Languages To Learn" list, for now it'll have to wait.

The Danish and Norwegian books have been much, much better. I've learned much of the basics of both languages -- though I fear at some point I'll have to choose one or the other, because they're so similar that I'm bound to get confused. Until then, though... jeg laerer norsk og dansk!

Anyways, this particular anecdote is about Danish. I was reading one of the dialogue transcriptions in the book, despite the fact that I was at school and so couldn't exactly follow along with the CD. The dialogue in question involved shopping at the florist's.

The Danish word for 'bouquet' is 'buket.' As I read the dialogue, I could not stop mentally interpreting the word 'buket' as 'bucket.' Which would make the dialogue go something like this:

"I would like a bucket of flowers, please. How much does the bucket of roses cost?"
"The big bucket with 10 roses is 60 kr."
"That's a bit expensive. How much does the small bucket cost?"
"The small bucket of tulips and daffodils costs 15 kr."
"That's cheap. I would like that bucket, please."

I began to laugh at the mental image of a guy bringing his date a bucket of flowers. Because nothing's classier than a bucket, right?

"Here you go, darling! A bucket of flowers just for you!"
"Oh George, how lovely! And when they wilt, I can use the bucket to store the toilet plunger!"

I dunno. Maybe that was funnier in my head, but you have to admit that buckets are the least romantic container out there.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

The Magical Metamorphosis of Opinions

Whether or not you agree with their opinions, you gotta feel bad for politicians from time to time. The media constantly digs up dirt from their past lives and throws in their faces, as though what they did when they were sixteen should affect whether or not people vote for them.

Is it fair to expect politicians to have led perfect, exemplary lives? Is it fair to expect that they knew their platform and have had their current values since they were children? I don't think so. Opinions change all the time - especially as teenagers, we explore different points of view. I, at least, would rather have someone in office who considered issues from different perspectives and then decided which one was best than someone who has been set in their ways all their life. How do they know that their opinions are best, if they've never tried anything else?

Since posting what I did last night, I've been thinking about the ramifications of saying controversial things in public places. In twenty years, I might be a writer, and make a living by asking difficult questions. Or in twenty years, I might have job at the UN, or as a diplomat.

I hope someday I can do both. But are they mutually exclusive? Do I have to give up my right to ask controversial questions in order to be liked and successful?

Everything I say, by the way, is a question. However I word things, I do not mean them to be statements of absolute truth. I'm sharing my current opinion with you, and inviting you to challenge me. There are very, very few things that I have concrete beliefs about, and I'm always open to new ideas.

If you don't like what I say, don't hate me for it. Stand up and change my mind. It's open.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Of Free Speech and Pedophiles

Warning: potentially weird/offensive/controversial subject matter ahead. Proceed with caution. Bring lots of chocolate.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11731928

For those of you who are too lazy to read the news article (it's only a few paragraphs! C'mon!) I'll provide a little summary. Basically, a book called The Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure: a Child-lover's Code of Conduct is up for sale on Amazon. As you can imagine, this book isn't being published by a company - rather, the author is using Amazon's self-publishing service, which allows writers to sell their books on Amazon and and share the profits. As you can also imagine, there are a number of people who are quite unhappy that the book is being made available. Amazon does have a policy against obscene materials, but it doesn't define 'obscene.'

This is Amazon's statement on the matter:

"Amazon believes it is censorship not to sell certain books simply because we or others believe their message is objectionable. Amazon does not support or promote hatred or criminal acts, however, we do support the right of every individual to make their own purchasing decisions."

This is a comment posted by an Amazon user:

"I have seen first hand the harm that people like the author of the book, and potential readers, do to children and to see a book like this on Amazon's 'shelves', so to speak, is very troubling to me."

This the view of the book's author:

"The author, listed as Philip R Greaves II, argues that paedophiles are misunderstood and purports to offer advice to help them abide by the law."

---

So, what's the deal with all this? Well, it reminded me of our lesson on free speech in Government class today. In the United States, according to the First Amendment's free speech clause, words cannot be censored before they are spoken and deemed to be harmful. If words are censored before they are expressed, the law would be making an assumption in regards to exactly what the content of those words would be.

Obviously, seeing a book proclaiming itself to be a guide for pedophiles rests well with no one. The word 'pedophile' automatically brings this image of a creepy forty-year-old man stealing children away from playgrounds, or twisted day care workers abusing their positions for their own pleasure. But are we making assumptions?

The definition of 'pedophile' is "someone who is sexually attracted to children.' Is there contained anywhere within that definition 'someone who rapes children?' Or 'someone who takes indecent pictures of children?' Or 'someone who exploits children for their own pleasure?'

Human sexuality is quite possibly the most demented and incomprehensible thing that ever existed. I, at least, firmly believe that none of us can help who or what turns us on, and that there's not a thing in the world that doesn't turn someone on. (Rule 34, my friends.) Can you imagine being a perfectly good and honest person, and one day realizing that you're sexually attracted to children? You haven't done anything - you haven't harmed a child in any way - but already, you're a monster in society's eyes, because the actions of other people like you have driven us to feel immense disgust towards all of your kind.

Now, of course, there are pedophiles out there who've done horrible, horrible things to children. Please don't misunderstand me - I'm not denying that. All I'm saying is that we, as humans, do tend to make assumptions. I'm sure that there are quite a few pedophiles out there who have never acted on that impulse, and are therefore perfectly respectable people.

Is it right for us to assume that this book up on Amazon is written by and for cruel, demented people who act on their pedophilia? What if this book has been written, as the author claims, for the people who know they have this urge, but want desperately not to act on it? Then, wouldn't allowing them access to advice on how to control their feelings make children safer?

I have no idea what the content of this book is - I haven't read it and never will. All I'm saying is, before these people who are threatening to boycott Amazon criticize, they should at least read the damn thing they're protesting against. There are things in life like escargot - they sound like a terrible idea, but if you look closer, hey, they might actually not be so bad.

Bottom line: Torches and pitchforks are fun and sometimes necessary, but let's get informed and think through all the possibilities before we reach for them.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

My Brain's Being Productive Today!

A random idea came flying down from the heavens and smacked me in the face today.

One of the most awesome parts about the Internet (in my opinion, at least) is that you can meet people from all over the place. I could go on and on about all the random cool things I've learned about what life's like in different places just by having conversations over the Internet.

So, wouldn't it be awesome if there was a website which was solely dedicated to learning these random cool things and asking seemingly useless questions? Like, say you wanted to know what people think of McDonalds in, I dunno, Germany. You could ask this question, a German member could answer it for you.

Obviously, a website like this would start out slowly. For it to work the way I'd like it to, it would need time to attract a diverse membership. But it could start small. Even within the United States - heck, even within this town, people have a bunch of different lifestyles. There are probably people out there wondering what it's like to be in cross country, or to live on a farm, or to live in... Maltby. And from there, it would grow.

And once it's grown, wouldn't it be a wonderful resource for writers, travelers, and plain old curious people?

I'm seriously thinking about starting a site like this, using a forum host site since I don't know enough about web design to actually make one myself. It would probably be a message board style deal, with usernames and avatars and such so that you could choose exactly how anonymous you want to be.

Is anybody interesting? Have any suggestions for the name of this site? Any suggestions in general?

Friday, October 22, 2010

Life is Beautiful, and I'm Analyzing That!

Is it wrong to analyze something beautiful?

I answered a question about grammar during Knowledge Bowl yesterday, and the kid next to me asked "What use is grammar? It's language! Why would you want to analyze that?"

On one hand, I agree with him. I love the freeness and beauty and pliability of language. 'Grammar nazis' annoy me to no end - language evolves because we use bad grammar, and the most correct sentence isn't always the most powerful one. But on the other hand, grammar fascinates me. There's actually rhyme and reason behind something we do without thinking, and to me, that's an interesting concept.

So, is language not meant to be analyzed? Is it wrong of me to want to analyze it?

I was reminded of English class. Everybody hates having to analyze what we read. For many of us, all the enjoyment is taken from the book by being forced to hunt between the lines for hidden meaning that we doubt is there.

Our English teacher this year sympathises with us. The author didn't write the book for us to tear it apart, he says. But I remember that one girl in my class wasn't happy when he told us this. She enjoys looking for the possible significance behind each word, and wanted to know if that meant she was missing the point of reading.

Our English teacher then asked us if you had to know all the parts of a flower to enjoy it. We said no, obviously. Then he asked us if there weren't types of flowers - Venus flytraps, for example - that were more interesting once we had studied them and knew how they worked.

Yesterday afternoon, my sister returned from her music lessons super excited. Her teacher had taught her a little bit of music theory, and my sister had become so fascinated with it that they'd spent the rest of the lesson on that subject.

Does my sister love music any less because she thinks music theory is interesting? Somehow, I doubt it.

My conclusion from all of this was that anything beautiful can be enjoyed on two levels. Most people enjoy it for what they can see from the surface. That's totally fine. That's how the people who created the stuff want you to see it, anyways. But some people want to dig deeper, and when they do, they appreciate the thing even more.

And that's not wrong either. What is wrong - what makes people lose their appreciation for something they should think is lovely - is when people who want to see something from the surface are forced to dig deeper against their will.

And that, my dear sirs and madams, is my two cents for the day.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Overhaul Time!

I knew that this was gonna have to happen at least once.

So, yeah, the way I'm using this blog right now is evidently not working out, seeing as I post on average once a month, and that's quite unacceptable. I've been thinking about ways to solve this problem, and have finally come to a lovely conclusion.

The reason I decided to make a blog in the first place was quite simple, actually. I wanted a place to spill all those random thoughts I have and observations I make that are too long and detailed to put in a Facebook status. But I've begun expecting too much of myself when I write here, meaning that my only blog posts end up being overthought and boring or things that slipped by when I was too frustrated to care and are therefore very random and crappy.

So, I've decided I want to return to the original spirit of the thing. From now on, I'm going to try to post at least three times a week, but the posts will be much shorter and more informal than many of the previous ones, and will probably deal with one of three subjects:

-My explorations in language learning. I've started trying to teach myself German and Norwegian, and sort of dabble around in other languages from time to time. So far it's been quite an interesting endeavor, and should give me plenty of thoughts to share.
-Random thoughts or observations for the day.
-My journal that I kept while in Europe (it was pointed out to me that I only posted one entry and should probably post the rest.)
-Maybe, once a blue moon, something intelligent and well-written.

(Okay, that's four, shut up.)

Let's see how this works out.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

I Want To Go North

As in, way up north. Way, way, way up north. Far enough north that I can see the Northern Lights and the Midnight Sun and that I'll go outside and freeze.

I don't care exactly where I go. I could go to Alaska or Nunavut, Greenland or Tromsø, Lapland or Murmansk or wherever. I don't really know why I want to go either. I just do. When I think of the north, it seems so unreal. Up there, it's light when it should be dark and dark when it should be light. It's too cold - humans shouldn't be able to live in that sort of cold - but they do. When I think of the north, I think of white snow and soft blue ice and gray sky, of short tundra grass and the ocean, and it seems so weirdly inviting.

I don't know why I want to go north, but I do. I just want to wander up to the top of the world and hang there for a bit.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Thinking About the Rain

Y'know, in a way I'm sort of happy that summer's ending. I mean, I love being off from school as much as the next person, but I'm really not one for the heat or the sun.

Right now, I'm sitting on the floor in my room, with a blanket, my dog, and a dim light next to me, listening to the sound of the rain on my roof. And it's lovely.

I love rain. To me, it's like the ultimate symbol of cleansing and renewal. It washes away all the dust and heat and turns the brown grass green. It makes the formerly ugly pavement sparkle under the streetlights. It forms puddles on the sidewalk that are perfect for splashing in. I remember that in elementary school, I used to love to walk through the rivulets that ran down the street to the storm drains. I've never minded getting wet - in fact, I love the feeling of raindrops seeping through my hair.

And while waking up in the morning and seeing a gray sky may be depressing sometimes, it only makes it that much more special when you wake up and see the sun.

I'm probably prejudiced because I've grown up in a very rainy area. But still.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

I FEEL LIKE ABUSING MY BLOG...

BY TYPING HEARTS EVERYWHERE!

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3><3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3><3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3><3 <3 <3

AND YES, I AM USING CAPSLOCK. BECAUSE I AM IMAGINING MYSELF TALKING LIKE BILLY MAYS, AND I USE CAPSLOCK WHEN I FEEL LIKE GRAPHEMICALLY REPRESENTING MY BILLY MAYS-NESS.

AND I AM NOW AMAZED THAT GRAPHEMICALLY IS ACTUALLY A WORD. GO ME FOR FINDING ACTUAL WORDS TO REPRESENT MY INSANE SENTIMENTS.


*the shot pans out, and a phone number and some sort of fancy logo appear at the bottom of the screen*

This is why college searching is dangerous to your health and should only be done in moderation, children. Side effects may include insanity, hair loss, and desire to become a hermit and spend the rest of your life under a rock. Please call this help hotline if you experience any of these symptoms.

Together, we can make a difference.

Thank you.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Thousands of Feet Above The Ground In a Metal Tube

This is the journal I kept while in Europe in its original form, with no editing. Most of it was written either spontaneously during a few minutes' break, or back in the hotel room when I was exhausted and probably falling asleep on the page. Therefore, please excuse any faulty grammar, poor sentence structure, and otherwise bad writing.

Enjoy!


July 4, 2010
Somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean

Been in a plane for about eight hours. Got about two and a half left. Tried to sleep at least a gazillion times. No such luck. Hoping I'll be able to sleep between Paris and Munich. If not, I'm gonna need a heck of a lot of caffeine.

The sky outside is very pretty. It's a sort of purple-y blue, with bands of red and pink near the horizon. The clouds underneath us look fluffy, like a cotton ball carpet. Sadly, most people have the shades down, so I can only see tiny chinks here and there. Tried to get a picture. Not sure how well it turned out though.

We had dinner very early, like four o' clock our time. There was a bowl of curry pasta with chicken, which honestly was more like cold couscous than pasta, but pretty good nonetheless; some hot fish with tomato sauce and rice; a wrapped cheese rectangle; a circular, school-style container of water which was bottled in Wisconsin but inexplicably had a Canadian maple leaf on it; a bun which I didn't eat; a brownie which I quite happily did; and some tapioca pudding, which I saved but neglected to save a spoon for.

Right now the lights are off because it's supposed to be sleepy-time. I know I should be sleeping, but sleep is not forthcoming....

This place has a pretty sweet video system. You can watch movies (I've seen people watching everything from Alice In Wonderland to The Princess and the Frog to A Bug's Life to Avatar) and TV shows, including travel and nature documentaries and sports. I tried to watch the news but it didn't work. I watched an episode of How I Met Your Mother, and then watched the same episode again in French when I got bored. Mostly, I've played a trivia quiz game (geography, in French, because I can.) Also played Space Invaders and tried Who Wants to be a Millionaire but it was too hard even in English.

Started 1984. Creepy book.

Everything said over the intercom is said in French first, then English. I understand a pleasing amount of it, and of the things the cabin crew say to each other. My screen's been in French the entiere time. I've learned some new words-- most notably, 'strait' in French is 'detroit.'

Watching the map inch by on my screen. The close up now shows up approaching Ireland instead of under Iceland. I started wanting off when we were over Saskatchewan-- though I suppose it's not too terrible. I still haven't even taken out my iPod. I just want to sleep and can't.

One hour, fifty-eight minutes left. I guess I'll go for attempt gazillion and one.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Colonization for Dummies

Right now I'm studying for my U.S. History final and as I'm reviewing all the stuff about the colonies, this is all I can think:

Colonizing the New World for Dummies

If you are French...
  • Go explore the delicious forests of Canada (yes, I'm using the adjective 'delicious'... they produce maple syrup, okay?) and make friends with the natives. Your trade will make them very happy campers indeed, and they'll even take your side when you fight those stupid Englishmen in a few hundred years or so. This, in turn, will create a spark of confidence that'll eventually lead to those other colonies rebelling against the stupid Englishmen, and then you can show up those stupid Englishmen again! Of course, you'll lose Canada in the end, but it'll be worth it because your legacy, Quebec, won't let your influence die! They'll even try to secede a few times and make the entire country speak your language!
  • Alternately, if you're adverse to cold weather and moose, go settle Louisiana and eat shrimp.
If you are Dutch...
  • Go chill out in the Middle Colonies for awhile. Don't really conquer anyone, but trade like crazy and make a crapload of money instead. Be sure to buy your land from the natives. They take kindly to it, even if that's because they tricked you and they didn't really own it in the first place. Give your settlement an amazingly original name, like New Amsterdam. Build a nice wall. In the future, a street will run where your wall was and people will fittingly call it Wall Street. Go ahead, boot the Swedes off the Delaware River and out of the New World. The English'll return the favor and boot you out in a little bit anyways. And don't worry-- when they rename your settlement, it'll be something just as creative. Like New York.
If you are Russian...
  • Settle Alaska. The cold will make you feel right at home. Trap furs and hunt animals. Make money. Once you've trapped and hunted so much that there's not much more profit left to be had, sell Alaska to the United States. Don't worry, your former colony won't be too far away. Sarah Palin can still see you from her house.
If you are Norse...
  • Get here several hundred years before anybody else does. Land at a point in Newfoundland and call the place Vinland. Build a little settlement if you feel like it and celebrate your lovely discovery. Then shrug, turn around, and go back home. Greenland is way cooler anyways.
If you are Italian...
  • Volunteer your exploration services to the lovely Spanish monarchy. Get to Americas about 492 years after the Norsemen, but claim you got there first. Fail epically at geography and force future generations to constantly have to clarify "Indians like Native Americans, or Indians from India?"
If you are Spanish...
  • Forget Canada. There's no gold there. Screw the U.S. There's no gold there. Focus on Central and South America! That's where the gold is, baby! ...Well, make an exception for California. Because there's totally gold there. And maybe Florida too. Disneyworld is very profitable.
If you are a Puritan...
  • Go found a colony with a name so complicated that generations of schoolchildren will despair when spelling it. Be so scarily religious that in the future some poor students will have to write AP essays about how your religion affected every aspect of your lifestyle. Have families. Build towns. Burn the witches.
If you are supposed to a Puritan but aren't...
  • Screw Massachusetts. Rhode Island is waiting.
If you are a Quaker...
  • Settle a pretty darn epic colony called Pennsylvania. Be super-tolerant and nice to the natives. Annoy everybody. Found the city of Philadelphia-- it'll serve you all well as a capitol for quite awhile, even if in the future it's a scary city where everyone wants to knife you.
If you are Catholic...
  • Well, aren't you in a fun situation? Britain just can't decide whether to be Catholic or Protestant, so one second you're happy as clams, and the next, you might lose your charter. As a compromise, say that you're going to be religiously tolerant and welcome both Catholics and Protestants into your colony. Also, execute any non-Christians you come across.
If you just want to get rich...
  • Go south. Start a plantation. Import slaves. Grow tobacco. Then grow indigo. Then grow cotton. Drawl when you speak. Invent the word "y'all."

Hopefully, this guide helped you decide how to best fulfill your colonial ambitions.
Good luck. Have fun when the independence movement comes around.

Till next time!

Saturday, June 12, 2010

So. I did it. I actually created a blog.
Honestly, I'm very unsure about how this whole thing's gonna go over. I was told that I should start a blog because my Facebook status updates are arguably fairly amusing. But status updates and blog posts are two different things. When I post something on Facebook, all I have to do is think up a witty little phrase that's 420 characters or less, whereas blogs require me to keep my audience awake and drool-free for several paragraphs at least. Perhaps getting a Twitter would've been more fitting, but in my mind that would've been redundant as I already use Facebook for all my Twitter-like needs.
So here we are.

I figured a little overview of what to expect from this space would be an appropriate first post. My intentions, at this point, are to choose new topics for each post and explain them with a dash of quirk. Don't expect any "yeah, so, today I was tired and then I ate macaroni for dinner and then I tripped over my cat and broke my nose" sort of thing from me. I plan to write about stuff that isn't important in the grand scheme of things (hence my blog's title), but is interesting if you look at it properly. And then screw around with it a bit, because it's fun.
For example, have you ever wondered where cupcakes come from? Who invented them? Why? And what would cupcakes dream about if they were sentient?

So, in short, I'm hoping to learn some things while still being entertaining. I've always secretly-- somewhere deep down inside-- wanted to be an edutainment show. We'll see how this works out.

Thanks for reading, and till next time!